Are you the one who is always demotivated and have the toughest time in order to develop relationships and gain trusts of people at work? Well! There are 6 effective steps which can help to earn respect and influence people at work and become one of the key players of the team.
1. Improve Communication
It doesn’t matter if you are an entrepreneur, working professional, freelancer, student or politician. What matters most is whether you can connect, persuade, negotiate, influence and impact people to make a difference in their life and your own life as well. Every great leader in this world, past or present, has become influential because they mastered the skill of world-class communication.
Due to poor communication, the majority of people today are unable to get the career, position, salaries or respect they want. Most people think communication is just about having a reasonable command of language and speaking skills. But the fact is, communication is about being able to efficiently communicate your intent and purpose, as well as getting the response from the person you want.
I want you to know that there are three basic strategies for effective communication-
i. Most of our communication happens subconsciously
When you communicate, if you’re unaware of the other person’s state of mind, then your message may not be interpreted by others in the way you want. To communicate effectively, what you say to the other person must align with their beliefs and their values or else they will not comprehend your thoughts.
ii. Alter your communication style to cater for the person you’re speaking with
When you communicate with people, they want to feel that you understand them and you are genuinely interested in them. Asking more questions is one of the ways to understand their perspective so that you can frame your conversations accordingly and ensure the maximum output.
iii. Always communicate to have a win-win outcome
Nobody wants to lose anything in life. You need to identify the intent of your communication and the desired results you want to achieve. Also, identify what the other person wants and show them how they can achieve their desired outcome. You can only achieve what you want if you make the other person realize that you can help them achieve what they want.
2. Develop Interpersonal Skills
Interpersonal skills are nothing but having genuine care for people. When you want to gain influence in society or your workplace, you have to have genuine care for people around you. It enables you to give importance to others, listen to them actively, have empathy and solve their problems. When you care and work to help others solve their problems, they all work collectively for the best of your interest.
One of the best selling and most recommended books for developing interpersonal skills is How to Win Friends and Influence People. Written by Dale Carnegie and published in 1936, it was on Time magazine’s 100 most influential books list in 2011. This book is a guide in improving a person's aura in the world. It is about changing how the world views and treats you by changing your behaviors.
3. Add Value For People
Are you one of those who constantly gripe about your health, family, relationships, career, your boss or every other possible thing occurring in your life? Being human, we all complain, sometimes without even realising it. But rarely is it helpful. The world is in an abundance of problems- no one is interested in yours. Too much complaining will just break down your relationships with people, losing respect and value in society.
You need to be a problem solver to earn respect and become more influential. Add value for people who are above you as well as for those below you. Be accountable for everything you can and always aim to be a reliable person for all. Always give more than what you ask. The more you add value for people, the more you are likely to be valued.
4. Learn The Art Of Reciprocation
Dr Robert Cialdini, a psychologist, author and speaker, explains the art of reciprocation as “giving back what one receives from others”. People who implement reciprocation have achieved greater success, but many people are not implementing this strategy. He says that people should give first, and they will receive better results. Dr Cialdini states, “This puts a lot of control in the hands of the person who acts first. Whatever a person wants at the workplace, for example, a more positive attitude, if you offer it first, it flows back to you”.
This tendency has survived and been present throughout human history because it has survival value for the human species. The noted anthropologist Richard Leakey describes the essence of what makes us human as this system of reciprocity. “We are human because our ancestors learned to share their food and their skills in an honored network of obligation.” We are likely to be shamed or ostracized if we don’t integrate the rule of reciprocity into our behaviors'. So learn the art of reciprocation and how to make it work in your flavor.
5. Expand Your Network
Often, people misunderstand networking as an opportunistic practice lacking authenticity. Some people see it as unnecessary small talk and some as begging for favor's. But networking is an avenue to create long-term relationships with mutual benefits. Interacting with people from different professions, nationalities, and cultures gives you a broader scope of life. Your open-mindedness increases every time you socialize with people from diverse backgrounds, ages and points of view. Networking is an opportunity to practice starting conversations, communicating clearly and learning about people around you. These interactions will increase your confidence, and you will no longer feel anxious about starting a conversation with strangers.
Remember, the degree of your success always depends upon the number of people who remember your name. People with a good network are likely to be luckier than those without one.
6. Build Trust and Admiration
Trust is hard to define, but we do know when it’s lost. When that happens, we withdraw our energy and level of engagement. According to a survey of 33,000 people in 28 countries, one in three people doesn’t trust their employer. Working in an untrustworthy organization, employees withhold their talents, creativity, energy and passion. As a result, they lose productivity, innovation capabilities, competitive edge, and more.
But how to ensure working in a trusted environment? By building one of your own. His Holiness- the Dalai Lama says, “You can’t buy trust in the supermarket. You have to show some concern for others to earn trust.” Build trust and admiration for yourself in people above as well as below you. One of the few ways to do this is to keep transparency with your people. Communicate if someone hurts you. Sharing our feelings with the person who hurt us might help us see things differently and realize that their intention was not what we imagined. Similarly, seek confrontation if you feel you have done something to lose another person’s trust. Keeping promises, exhibiting reliability and being honest are other ways of building trust in people. If people trust you and aspire to be like you, you naturally gain influence in life.
If you liked reading this post, I request you to comment your views below and share this.